Mother's Day Without Our Mothers

This is Mother's Day weekend and tomorrow is, of course, Mother's Day. It is a wonderful sentiment to set aside this one day where all of America can pause and honor those from whom we all came.

In our first fleeting moments of life, we were held by her and kissed gently. It may have been a difficult delivery for her, or perhaps you were delivered via surgery. Or, maybe you were like my sister Lori and had no trouble at all with delivering children.

But, from then on, we forged a special bond with our mothers and for some girls (many I suspect), the ages of 13 - 18 were difficult years as you became young women and bumped heads with your mother on so many things. I remember a classmate in a seminar calling those years, the "dark ages."

But, it seems that once you turned 19, you understood all those things she tried to teach you about being a lady, and being chaste, or being a woman and perhaps even a mother yourself.

I know that many of us still have our mothers here with us to honor and lavish praise upon, while some of us do not. We are of the age where our mothers have gone Home and are no longer here for us to go to when we need them. They are not here to just talk to every now and then to have that lineage intact.

It will be 16 years since my mother went Home and trust me, I miss her very much. For some of you, it may be more recent, but whether it was 5 days, 5 years, or 25 years, we feel the loss of them keenly.

So, for some of us, tomorrow will be bittersweet. Some of us may not take it well and withdraw from your friends and family. Some of you may have even started days ago in anticipation of this weekend.

But, if I may, let's take a look at a few things:

• How many things do you say that your mother used to say?
  
• How many times have you been told that you look just like her?
  
• How many times have you noticed that you do your hair just like her?
  
• How many times have you remembered one of her admonishments before you were getting ready to do something really dumb?
  
• How many times have you made a meal because, well, that's how Mom made it?
  
• How many times have you disciplined your children the way your mother disciplined you?
  
• How many times have you thought to yourself: "Dang, Mom was right about that?"
  
• How many times have you done ANYTHING because that's the way your mother taught you?

It is almost as if she never left, huh?

Listen, I'm not going to even intimate that the sense of loss is not real? Nor will I remotely suggest that you "get over it."

Our mothers were so important and vital to us because, let's face it, our family structures are often set up where it was your mother who was/is always there while dad is doing what is expected of him, or he is or wasn't there at all.

On THIS Mother's Day, let's try and forgo the solemn and sad remembrance and treat her memory as we try to do when someone ELSE is called Home and be happy and joyous for them. They are absent from the body and present with the Lord. They have the privilege of being next to Him who first breathed life into us all. She is in communion with the saints and we are still here trying to do the best we can.

If she left here with Christ at her side, I would think that she would want YOU to do the same thing. I think she would love to know that you followed her counsel and became a vibrant young man or woman in the manner she prescribed.

You may be and feel very lonely without her physically, but if you re-scan that list above, I think you would agree that she is here every moment of every day.

• Remember her tears of joy at so many of the good things that you did to make her proud of you.
  
• Remember the tears of sadness at some negative that you perhaps didn't realize she was feeling with you.
  
• Don't forget that there are many things that she did not share with you and you may not have known just deeply YOU affected HER.
  BE a mother to one who is without her mother; counsel her; listen to her; hold her; cry with her. It's your turn now...

If you are a mother yourself, fill that void...just like she would want you to.

So, tomorrow, on this secular holiday, and for every day after that, make Mother's Day special -- in her name...

May your first prayer tonight, after thanking Him for your life, be to thank Him for hers...